On BLM and racism

Racism has been on all of our minds and everyone is at a different point in their self-awareness journey on race and privilege. I've got a lot of things to say, and am reading daily and learning more during this time. I've always been actively reading and forming my personal opinions on equity, at least for the past ten years. But there also comes a point when you want to do something about it, and for me that means to speak up more.

Right now, it seems to be the thing to do for every company to denounce the current acts of police brutality and to stand with Black Lives Matter. It is almost a check mark at this time. Every influencer and small business on social media appear to be obliged to show a front to their customers. “I stand with Black people (let’s ignore the fact that I don’t have diverse employees myself), now please buy from my shop!” 

They go on to say, "We've had raw conversations and have taken the first steps to heal, now it is time for action", and pledge their donations or propose policy changes. It's kind of a day late and dollar short, isn't it? I don't think the Black community are at the "healing" stage yet, and you (general you) don't get to decide how they feel.

Our industry is now in the process of changing the language used in technical terms. Things like whitelist and master/slave terminology in computers and networking are being removed. I have always cringed at these terms and wonder why it took company mandates for people to stop using them.

On the other side of the coin are the ones who are saying nothing. Yes, some people “don’t do politics”. People are busy. But I hope many recognize their race-based privilege in being able to go on with their day to day lives, their hobbies, their work, and their busy schedules without missing a beat and not being completely affected and overwhelmed these past few weeks.  

Racism exists all over the world. It is time for country leadership and company leadership to do more than denounce it. This week, many companies provided trainings and resources to employees. They feel that they are doing their part. But, don’t teach it once and call it a day. It needs to be comprehensive and repeated often. Every company needs way more diverse and equitable leadership, because white people trying to come up with a solution just isn’t cutting it. Enough with the figurehead positions for Black people and POC.

Sometimes, I am frustrated at my lack of being seen as a peer at work. This week, instead of breaking my head trying to figure out yet another strategy for not being walked all over, I felt like I needed to speak up. This is unlike me and my people-pleasing non-confrontational self, but I realize that the change needs to begin within us. We have to stop asking for a seat at the table and start expecting it. I drafted an email outlining my thoughts, but it gave me so much anxiety and sleepless nights that I never hit send, and even stopped editing and drafting and burying myself in my regular work. On the other hand, painful reminders of my plight are bombarding me everyday and it is difficult to ignore. But the seeds have been planted, my thoughts are getting organized, and if and when I am ready, I can choose to hit "Send".

As a non-Black POC I am not claiming to empathize with the plight of the Black community. I can only relate to some extent on experiencing racism because of my brown skin, and to having privilege over other groups in my race on account of my background and upbringing in India. Two sides of the coin, so to speak.

Recently, I read about a race-motivated incident in my neighborhood. My husband was disturbed by it, but as for me? I was not terribly surprised and just felt it is another of those situations that we need to map out beforehand how we would respond if we're ever faced with it. It was another family like mine where the woman was Indian (I think) and the man was white. Apparently he got harassed on the street with racist comments. There was an outpouring of support for this family, which was good. But it bothered me that people instantly "approved of" this family where the man happened to be white. No one said "did you do something to provoke this?" and "there are two sides to every story" like they do with other race-motivated attacks. A few were quick to dismiss the racist guy as "mentally ill". 

It is frustrating, but at the same time, as more of these incidents come to light, I hope we start making steps towards progress. 

I am really tired of the people to whom this is all new and who are trying to be showboat allies. I've faced permanent consequences of my race in my life and career and people think they can just wake up one day and show compassion. No, I don't need you to chaperone me in my own neighborhood. I need workplaces to treat us all fairly. We need complete and total police reform - a rip and replace. It's made me very emotional to read about these dads that are being taken from their families and to to have people still clinging to their own misguided beliefs.

On to resources and responses that I could resonate with:

We had an inspiring guest speaker speak to us recently: Bryan Stevenson. He is a prominent American civil rights attorney and has written a best-selling book called “Just Mercy”. In this memoir, he talks about how he appealed the case of Walter McMillian, an African American who was wrongfully convicted and sentenced on a murder charge. There is also a film made about it and it is available for free in the month of June: https://www.justmercyfilm.com/https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q7MxXxFu6fI

A few world leaders (Trudeau, Merkel) have talked about how racism exists in their own countries and I think people the world over are making small steps towards a better society.

I liked Ben and Jerry’s statement. While many companies are only now saying “We stand with our Black employees”, Ben and Jerry’s is way ahead of the game and essentially saying “We gotta smash white supremacy”:

https://www.benjerry.com/about-us/media-center/dismantle-white-supremacy

(Eat all their icecream...)

The younger generation seem to be working for a more equitable future. 

The changes are beginning with awareness and education. Let's see how they go with action. I wonder if more people like Alexis Ohanian will step aside to make room for POC. 

I look at my daughter, and I feel this intense anguish at what she might have to go through in life because of her race. I have hope though that our kids' lives will be better than ours. And to all those people reminiscing fondly about their childhoods and how things used to be so much better - no, they really did not. There was discrimination, hate, sexism, homophobia and racism that ran rampant. Every day and every year we are getting just a little better in our society and I hope that we are able to overcome these problems eventually.