Two weeks and it’s hardly a blip on my radar

The crystal clear waters of the lake

This week marks two weeks of me being dairy-free. The past few days were a bit challenging due to us being on a road trip to Tahoe. I had to stray from my dairy-free-ness a few times – I ate a frozen naan which probably had ghee in it, a croissant and garlic bread both of which had butter, and a slice of cake which probably had milk and butter. I did not feel like refusing our host, although I must admit that for my cake-loving self I was surprised not to really crave it.

But for the most part, I was able to stay dairy-free and it was surprisingly easy to clarify at restaurants or choose foods at home to do so. I feel a bit stronger and more energetic but it is still too early to say. I also don’t notice much change with my skin yet (I’d like to think there is an improvement, but it could very well be wishful thinking). I do notice my hair is a lot silkier and shinier, kind of like it is when I am in India. Since we consume very little dairy while in India and the protein in the milk is of a different kind there, that might have something to do with it. The other factor for my hair is that I haven’t been swimming and the my hair is doing much better without the constant chlorine exposure.

I will probably continue with my diet for a few more weeks and then try to push it to three months. I hope I will be able to determine the right choice and balance for my body. I recently read an article about how we need to understand our bodies and how they respond to various foods, but that on the other hand diets never work. The takeaway being that each of us needs to arrive at meal choices that are optimal fuel for our bodies and don’t cause more damage than they are worth. This can be done a by combination of medical tests, nutritionist consults and meal tracking along with a detailed look at cause and effect. Even the quantities and frequencies of our meals matter. It is so individual and specific that following a pre-defined diet is not usually a sustainable answer, but a slow and careful process of being deliberate with what we eat and don’t helps us get there.

With that, I’ll wrap up this post with a picture of Lake Tahoe and a song from Yazoo. I just made myself laugh a bit when I mis-typed “Nobody’s diary” as “Nobody’s dairy”, a total overuse of this word of late.

Nobody’s Diary by Yazoo

If I wait for just a second more,

I know I'll forget what I came here for,

My head was so full of things to say,

But as I open my lips all my words slip away

And anyway,

I can't believe you want to turn the page,

And move your life onto another stage,

You can change the chapter you can change the book,

But the story remains the same if you'd take a look.

For the times we've had I don't want to be, a page in your diary babe,

For the good, the bad I don't want to see, a page in your diary babe,

For the happy, the sad, I don't want to be another page in your diary.

Perhaps if I held you I could win again,

I could take your hands we'd talk and maybe then,

That look in your eyes I always recognize,

Would tell me everything is gonna be fine,

You're gonna be mine

For a long time

For the times we've had I don't want to be, a page in your diary babe,

For the good, the bad I don't want to see, a page in your diary babe,

For the happy, the sad, I don't want to be another page in your diary.

A week ahead in the game.

A big congratulations to myself for completing a week of being dairy-free! Today marks the start of week two of me being dairy-free. I think that this journey is multi-pronged for me. I am using it to first work on my physical health and fitness. I have spent a bit of time reading about its benefits. I am also working on this for my mental health, energy and confidence with the idea that you can only do better when you feel better, starting a positive chain reaction. And thirdly (this probably ties in to mental health too), I am ethically conflicted about the dairy industry.

Reading about dairy farms and how handle the cows, forcing them to lactate and then tearing them away from their newborn calves does not sit well with me. I have learnt about how the cows’ lifespan often is cut short and they are raised in in confined quarters. The poor young calves that the milk is specifically for are torn away from their mothers for our selfish use. I know that there are various levels of humane methods to raise cows. But I am not sure how we can justify our continued abuse of them. There is also all the hormone treatment that makes it into our milk to think about. However, I am not sure if I will be able to remain dairy-free or if I will give in to its temptation. I might also later conclude with new research that its nutrients are beneficial after all in the long term. Coming out as ethically against dairy farming while resuming my consumption of dairy would make me very hypocritical. So I will choose to remain ethically aware but base my reasons for being dairy free primarily on my health for the time being.

Since beginning my own breastfeeding journey, I feel strongly about the idea that cows milk is meant for cows and not for us, and want to continue extended breastfeeding to benefit my son and to cut down on our dairy consumption at the same time.

So, one week down and a few more to go. I read that any new practice becomes habit after three weeks of consistently doing it. I hope I can retain my resolve. The coming week will be challenging since we are planning a road trip. I will have to make sure to choose well on all restaurant menus or to state my dietary preferences.

The other practice I am eagerly looking to try is that of gratitude. I want to learn to give thanks for all things both big and small and to change my perspective, outlook and personality accordingly. There is also the ulterior motive that doing this brings more positive influences into our lives, but even if this is not true, the feel-good benefit is a good thing to have. I hope that all of the things I am working on are positive actions and have a good impact on us.

Diary of a Dairy-free Dame

Pic of the creek on our Saturday morning walk

Day 1 Dairy free and Goals

Today is September 30^th (at the time this post was written) and is a date I have chosen to go dairy free. Goals are to remain dairy-free for the following durations:

1.     Today

2.     3 days (until Oct 2^nd)

3.     1 week

4.     2 weeks

5.     3 weeks

6.     1 month

7.     1.5 months

8.     2 months

9.     3 months

10.  Re-evaluate

This is my ten-step program and I am excited to try it out. It also signals a fresh start. Today is a half yearly point for me, and is also the beginning of Navratri (technically the second day), which is a nine-day period to signal the triumph of good over evil ending with Vijayadashami or Dussera on the tenth day of the festival.

From Wikipedia, this is the significance of the second day is as follows:

“Day 2: Brahmacharini

On Dwitiya, Goddess Brahmacharini, another incarnation of Parvati is worshiped. In this form, Parvati became Sati, her unmarried self. Brahmacharini is worshiped for emancipation or moksha and endowment of peace and prosperity. Depicted as walking bare feet and holding a japamala and kamandal in her hands, she symbolizes bliss and calm. Blue is the color code of this day. Blue colour depicts tranquility yet strong energy.”

So far, the day is quite ok in the sense that I don’t feel too tired or any pangs craving milk or milk-based products. I wonder when I will start seeing the benefits of cutting out dairy. I am going to give myself some grace this week on this new routine.

Day 2

Today is day two of me being dairy free. Yesterday without realizing it, I ended up eating a few pieces of my beloved paneer dish (cottage cheese). So unfortunately, I wasn’t dairy-free. My husband reminded me that it was still a huge change from how much dairy I was eating previously and is therefore very significant. I cooked palak paneer (cottage cheese in a spinach sauce) for dinner and picked out the paneer pieces and replaced them with aloo fry (sautéed potatoes with chili powder and turmeric, yum!). I enjoyed my dinner quite a bit. I am still counting yesterday as a dairy-free day and today as The Day I am Completely Dairy Free. Let’s see how it goes. I have no cravings so far, and am actually seeing some clear spaces in the fog that my mind is in – yay. My coffee (Illy espresso) with oats milk or almond milk still tastes yuck, but I suppose I will grow used to the taste presently.

Day 3

Today is Day 3! Once I get through today, I will have made it to goal #2 above! Yesterday, I thought I had a slip up when I ate Panda Express’ orange chicken. It’s listed in the ‘could contain dairy’ category and I was crushed when I learnt about it, because it could so easily have been avoided. However when I started to look into it more logically, I realized that the disclaimer was only to mention that it was possible it had traces of dairy in it, which matters to those that are severely allergic or sensitive to dairy. It does not actually have dairy as one of the ingredients. So whew, I continued to be dairy free yesterday. Today marks day 3 and I actually feel fine. No cravings so far, and I even put away the Belgian chocolate (Côte-d'Or)  that my husband brought home last evening from a European friend, shaking my head “No”. I am quite proud of myself. Last night was a night with very poor sleep, the baby woke up at 3:30 am after soaking through his sleep sack and I didn’t get a chance to sleep after that. However I am still awake, functioning (using the term loosely but that’s ok), and at work today. I have yet to decide about ghee and what to do about it. It is clarified butter, but is still dairy. It still involves bothering a cow and ethically does not help any if I eat it. It also wouldn’t count as a complete cleanse if I eat ghee since trace amounts of dairy will make it in to my diet. However, it is clarified butter and this means that not only is it lactose-free since all the liquid part is removed, but the clarification process also removes casein which is the problematic protein in milk. Also, there are several items in my freezer (rotis and frozen meals) that contain ghee and/or yogurt so I’ll have to decide whether to toss them or not. My plan is to cut out ghee as well from my diet and doing a complete cleanse in order to correctly evaluate my body’s response to dairy. After I am able to do this, in December perhaps, I can re-evaluate my health and see if it makes sense for me to reintroduce it into my diet both to add a layer of flexibility and to take advantage of all the other nutrients that ghee has to offer.

Day 4

Hello, day 4! I know that this is probably overkill and I am updating too often, but I really want to track this well. I don’t want to sensationalize or catastrophize and deduce that I am feeling amazing or like crap already because it may really be too soon to tell. There are so many other factors that go into it. I don’t want to be overly invested in the results to the point that I convince myself that I see a huge improvement and it was the dairy that was the cause of all my problems! I will just leave it at this: I don’t feel a huge change in either the positive or negative direction so far. I don’t have huge cravings which is great. I am tracking my weight and there’s no change there. My goal is to not gain or lose weight but to get to a better level of physical fitness and energy (and boy do I need it, with two high-energy littles ones to look after and a career and myself to nurture). I won’t lie, I am also secretly hoping (there, I said it) to see improvements in my skin, migraines and tinnitus. It’d be nice if the ulnar nerve pain and sciatica that sometimes flare up were taken care of as well. I know that realistically I should not invest too much into this to avoid being disappointed. But I am curious and it helps me remain motivated in staying dairy-free. I do feel a tiny bit more energetic. I also know that while I may have cut out dairy, my diet is not really healthy yet – I still tend to eat fried stuff like chips and some of my substitutions involve tossing veggies in oil so to serve as a snack or a quick side. I also haven’t exercised much this week compared to the impressive record of running, hiking and swimming last week. Oh well, not to worry, and that concludes my update for today.

Day 5

Made it through the work week! This week was significant in three ways. I had a meeting with a colleague and a career coach, and figured out what I want to do job wise. Secondly, dairy free. I like that I can have the willpower to do this. And thirdly, we booked a getaway next week which will be our first road trip as a family of four!

We had catered lunch at work and it was nicely marked with food allergy labels including two dishes that were dairy free and vegetarian. It was weird to eat them without being able to enjoy the bread but I didn’t miss out on much. We went out for dinner and I ate a chicken fajita sandwich with fries. I can’t wait to reach the one-week milestone.

Day 6 and Day 7

This was the weekend. I think I stayed dairy free quite easily. We had been invited to Navratri lunches both on Saturday and Sunday. For Saturday I was able to pick out paneer and avoid ghee on my rotis and abstain from any sweets (since they would contain milk or ghee). Sunday’s lunch was catered and I did not feel like asking the hosts about my diet. So I chose items which are normally prepared sans ghee (for example, I avoided the bisi-bele-bhath which is normally made with ghee, but ate the vegetable kurma) and hoped for the best. I avoided sweets again and I think this is a good added benefit to my new diet – I have ended up avoiding sweets and desserts and now feel the temptation less and less. With that, goals 1, 2 and 3 achieved!